New Definitions (LOL)

--Atom Bomb: ...... An invention to end all inventions.
--Boss:............... Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
--Cigarette: .............. A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool on the other.
--Classic: ............... A book which people praise, but do not read.
--Committee:............. Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
--Compromise: .......... The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.
--Conference Room: .. A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.
--Criminal: ............ A guy no different from the rest except that he got caught.
--Dictionary: ............ A place where success comes before work.
--Diplomat: ............ A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
--Doctor: ............. A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.

--Etc.: .............. A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
--Experience: ............ The name men give to their mistakes.
--Father: ............. A banker provided by nature.
--Lecture: ............. An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either.
--Miser: .............. A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.
--Office: .............. A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
--Philosopher: ......... A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.
--Smile: .............. A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
--Tears: .............. The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power.
--Yawn: .............. The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

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Image/Imagem: Google Images

Translation/Tradução: Heinz Claudius (when applicable)

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